Friday, May 2, 2014

It’s like going to church camp…

I can remember it like it was yesterday. Setting in church and getting the church camp flyer, begging my parents to go. Then the closer it got to leaving for camp, the more I’d get anxious about leaving the comforts of my home. Every year I’d go and I would HATE this first few days with a passion. I’m sure there were some tears shed at night. I just couldn’t understand how people could just fall asleep in a random bed. Thoughts would run through my mind… Was this mattress sanitized after the last camper? Does this bed have bugs in it? #aniextyattheageoften.

The feeling of being homesick passed just as quickly as the days did. Before I knew it, it was the last day of camp. While I was going to my clean bed was appealing, I knew I’d miss camp.

I feel like Arkansas is my church camp. I will never forget the day M came home when he got promoted.

M: “hey babe” with his big Dorito smile
Me: why are you smiling like an idiot #wifeoftheyear
M: I got it! I got it! I got the promotion!!!
Me: YEAH! Congrats blah blah blah
Me: So what does this mean?
M: It means we are moving.
Me: Great, we can use a bigger house.
M: No, babe we are MOVING… to ARKANSAS
Me: Stop playing… people don’t MOVE to Arkansas
M: I’m serious, we are moving to Arkansas. I need to be there by Monday. (It was Thursday)

That began the whirlwind.

We moved 6 hours from everyone we knew. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I remember being so angry that we were hear alone. Now looking back, I realize I was such a baby and I should have just made the best of it. You live and you learn. It took a good three years before I could leave STL without Kim Kardashian crying all the way home. We finally started calling Arkansas home. We finally met friends. We were settled. This was home.

Let’s stroll back to January 2014.

M: “babe can you keep a secret?”
Me: no
M: I really need you to keep this a secret.
Me: Fine but can I tell, Lauren, Marcia, Amy and my mom? They don’t count right...
M: NO, listen. There is a chance we may move back to STL. Would you be up to it?
Me: No, I’m fine here.

Fast forward to April 2014:

I get this email

With this announcement:

M, Area Manager-Construction and Engineering, *** Southwest, has accepted the position of Director-Construction and Engineering, ****Southwest. He will be responsible for outside plant construction in Missouri, Kansas and Arkansas, replacing *****, who retired. Mike will be located in St. Louis.

START THE TEARS. Do you know how awkward it is to start crying at your desk in front of your coworkers, especially when you can’t tell them why?

Then I get this email from M:

Hey babe please forward to you mom.

I appreciate both of you at what you do to help here.

Big team effort and a lot of hard work.

Love my life.

I mean god love the boy. I am so proud of him. He has worked his ass off to get this position and I couldn’t be more proud and sad.

Sad that his mom didn’t get to see this accomplishment
Sad that we are leaving Arkansas
Sad that I’m leaving friends
Sad that we won’t live in the house that H has always known as home, the house where she spoke her first words, where she learned to walk. Just sad

Sad that M had to leave last week and report to STL, leaving us in Arkansas.
Sad that I have 304,432 decisions to make. I can’t make a decision to save my life. Don’t believe me? Ask the cranky lady that told me to get out of her way at Kroger’s because I couldn’t decide if Natural Peanut butter was better than Reduce fat Peanut Butter.

I have been a mess this last week. Crying over every little thing. I miss M like a fat kid misses donuts. I need to get a grip. Pray for me.

Yes, moving will be sad. But it’s also a good thing.

I will be reunited with this hot mamma.All of our friends and family with be there. And more importantly GUESS WHO WILL BE BUYING WINE ON SUNDAYS!

This chick. #peaceoutdrycounty

This move will be bittersweet. But it will be good for us as a family.

I just need to find a way to get this girl to move to STL.

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