Friday, February 28, 2014

Finish the Sentence with Jake and Holly

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Because I have a 30,204 things to do at work today and I don’t know where to start…So I’ll channel my energy to my blog…since it’s been so neglected these days…

Echem…


1. I always pick WINE over BEER.
2. Look at the size of those...tee tah’s on Phillips from 100 days of summer. They are freakishly huge…
3. I recently learned....if I don’t run, I will gain weight…whomp whomp whomp
4. Only when no one is looking...I talk to myself… especially in the car.
5. I lost my....mind and repainted my kitchen red. I love it
6. I was certain I'd be...a stay at home mom who sent her kid to school. This work shit is overrated.
7. There is not enough liquor in the world for me to…to actually make H’s baby quilt. I think I’ll pay someone to do it.
8. I just finished...emailing my Bestie. She’s back at work and that makes me happy.
9. Why does everyone have to be... putting their business of Facebook? I mean is your husband REALLY that amazing? Are you really that BLESSED? Does anyone really care what you are eating for lunch?
10. it’s very rare when I...go a day without cursing. It’s bad. But who fucking cares?
11. If I were a dog...I’d be one of those prissy dogs who had bling around their neck and drank only Perrier
12. I don't believe...in divorce. You better work that shit out. Or don’t get married. Period. That’s why we don’t get married at 18. If HE eff’s up you buy a wood chipper and start over. BOOM. I feel the need to clarify that the wood chipper is a joke…. Just in case this is presented in court one day… lol… we’ve all seen 48hours.

4 comments:

  1. #12 is good. thanks for the laugh!

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  2. You just cracked me up several times. I love anyone who says the f word.

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  3. This post just reiterates that I feel we really should be best friends in real life.
    #12 - Amen (wood chipper - BAHA!!!)

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  4. Oh I hate how much #blessed is overused. LOL I am bitter. :)

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