Monday, October 7, 2013

What Marriage means to me

What marriage means to me.

Here I sit on Monday morning, not wanting to work. My normal ritual is to drink my spark while I browse my normal blogs. I came across a particular blog that was talking about marriage. I had to stop and read her intake.

Let’s be honest. Marriage aint easy and if someone can give me a little insight on it, I’ll take it. This adorable blogger explains what marriage means to her. As I read it I thought, man I really need to write down what marriage means to me. I laughed quietly to myself as I reminisced on the last 7 years of our relationship.

It all started with a cardinal’s game. I would say M and I fell pretty fast in “LOVE” if you will. He was “all in” within a month and was proclaiming his love for me. I guess I have that affect on people. I kid… I kid. We dated 3 yrs then I FOUND the ring and proceed to wear it when he wasn’t looking. Then he finally proposed and life threw us into a whirlwind of a out of state move, baby, family, death you name it, we went through it.

It’s easy to get caught up in the “wedding day” and not look at the full picture of marriage. Yes, my wedding day was the best day of my life (aside for having H)
After moving miles away from family and friends, our wedding day was more than perfect and just what our home sick hearts needed. We were surrounded by everyone we loved and…not to mention an open bar.
After a long night of dancing, laughing, cake and booze we sailed on our wedding day high for a few days then we drove our happy self home six hours away from everyone we knew and the marriage began.

Marriage takes work, it’s not always pretty and for the love of God it isn’t Disney. It’s more like Sex in the City if you ask me.

Here is what marriage means to me:

IT MEANS CHRIST IS YOUR ANCOHOR: Christ has to be the center of it all. That goes beyond marriage, Christ needs to be the center of YOU. I mean we ALL fall short of the glory of God, but with Christ nothing is impossible. Even marriage, some things in a marriage are bigger than you. You have to let go and let God. When M lost his mom, I had no idea what to say or do. I hadn’t lost anyone in YEARS. Do you ever pray and just not know what the heck to pray for? Yep, that was this girl. I had many prayers that went “Lord, I don’t even know what to pray, but we need you now more than ever…”

IT MEANS TO SHOW LOVE: This one is a tough. It’s not always easy to show love but it’s so important to show love in everything. Even when you are angry. Lord JESUS this isn’t easy, but it’s so important. I’m pretty spicy or like M says “excitable” if I’m angry you know it. I’ve learned you can’t take words back and at the end of the day will this little argument matter? M always says Is *insert ridiculous reason for an argument* really the end of the world? At the time it makes me angry but at the end of the day it’s so true.

IT MEANS COMMITMENT: Marriage to me means a commitment before God and all of your friends. Making a commitment to Love, Honor, and Cherish one another in good times AND bad. That’s pretty big. I always told M that divorce just wasn’t an option in my book. We may want one at times but it’s just not an option for me. If something is broke fix it. Period. Divorce is an easy out if you ask me.


  1. You three items are so important to a successful marriage. The most important phrase in our marriage lately is "calm down" (courtesy of our toddler). It is a simple reminder to me (usually) to breathe, relax, and refocus because we can't be a team if I get stuck on the "whatabouts." I think that divorce lets you not deal with issues that usually can be resolved.

  2. Your life pretty much mirrors mine. No joke.
    It didn't take long for me to figure out S was "the one." Though I didn't find my own ring (BAHAHAHAHA!!!).
    We moved half a country away, I planned the wedding from the coast, and we flew home for a week to get hitched.

    Our marriage is centered around Christ (and wine). And, one of the things I find that keeps us together, even on our worst days, is praying together each night before we go to bed. Some days it's difficult to find things to give thanks for, or things to as help for. But, without Christ we would always be searching for that "something" to make our marriage work as well as it does.

  3. This is very beautiful. Marriage is so difficult. It almost seems impossible but you do it and love it (at times). The best part of marriage is the inside joke and the absolute closeness you feel with that person. I really need to write what marriage means to me.